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open thread – May 23, 2025

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to […]

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 2 hours 51 minutes ago

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should I say I’m going to quit if my job doesn’t deal with my horrible coworker, 2 bosses in a row couldn’t say why they disliked my work, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Should I tell my job I’m going to quit if they don’t deal with my horrible coworker? I’ve been at this job for over 15 years. My coworker, Sally, has been here for less than three. She has questioned my experience and knowledge from the […]

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 13 hours 48 minutes ago

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what should I say when people miss meetings?

A reader writes: I’m the president of a small grassroots not-for-profit board and I have plenty of virtual meetings with other board members, volunteers, community partners, and staff for one reason or another. I’m wondering if you have any suggested language for when people no-show for meetings. It’s a relatively minor issue, but it happens […]

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 23 hours 51 minutes ago

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where are you now? (a call for updates)

It’s mid-year updates season! If you’ve had your question answered here in the past, please email me an update and let us know how your situation turned out. Did you take the advice? Did you not take the advice? What happened? How’s your situation now?  (Don’t post your updates here though; email them to me.) […]

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 1 day 1 hour ago

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stolen mugs, pilfered lunches, and missing iPads: let’s discuss office thefts

You’d like to think you can trust the people you work around, but in reality office thefts are surprisingly common. From the coworker who stole someone’s spicy food and got sick (and the epic update), to the manager who stole someone’s family heirloom, to the boss who stole an employee’s iPad, to the boss who […]

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 1 day 2 hours ago

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when you can’t give a good recommendation, firing someone right before her honeymoon, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Junior staff ask me for recommendations I can’t give without reservations I work with a number of support positions filled mostly by recent grads. Although they support my role, they are part of a different company and I have no supervisory role over them. A […]

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 1 day 13 hours ago

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managing a team that resists any change and complains constantly

A reader writes: I am the HR person for a small nonprofit which offers many different services to the public. We have one team in particular which has always been difficult to manage and has not really gotten along with any manager they have had. We’ve most recently brought in a new manager for this […]

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 1 day 23 hours ago

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update: my breastfeeding coworker won’t stop talking about her boobs

Remember the letter-writer whose breastfeeding coworker wouldn’t stop talking about her boobs? Here’s the update. It has been about a year since I wrote in. While the talk about breastfeeding specifically decreased about eight months in, my coworker’s seemingly endless need for attention and validation was unceasing. It got to the point where only about […]

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 2 days 1 hour ago

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my manager sucks at his job — should I talk to his boss?

A reader writes: I am looking for some advice on how to deal with my manager. I have worked in this organization for about three years, and my manager, Mark, started a few months before me. Out of all of the managers I’ve ever had, he is by far the kindest and most flexible (he’s […]

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 2 days 2 hours ago

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manager gets anxious about how I manage my time, telling my boss it would be OK to lay me off, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My manager gets anxious about how I manage my time even though I never miss deadlines My supervisor often assigns me projects well in advance of when they’re due. The problem is, she quickly gets anxious after assigning me work and mentions it repeatedly and […]

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 2 days 13 hours ago

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my coworker ignores the parts of his job he doesn’t like — could I do that too?

A reader writes: I have a coworker, Fred, who once told me the best work advice an older coworker gave him was “don’t be good at a job you don’t want.” In our three years working together, Fred has really shown he’s taken this advice to heart — unfortunately, at the expense of his team […]

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 2 days 23 hours ago

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two of my employees won’t speak to each other

A reader writes: I’m managing a department of eight people and two of them won’t speak to each other. I’m new to my position and it took me a couple of months to figure out that they weren’t talking. They literally won’t speak to each other. If we have a meeting, they won’t participate if […]

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 3 days 1 hour ago

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my employee thinks I’m intolerant of neurodiversity

A reader writes: A couple of weeks ago, I gave my employee, Rita, negative feedback on her behavior. It wasn’t what she was saying; it was how she was saying it. She was speaking rapidly and in a panicked but unwarranted manner. She was high-strung and scattered, and I felt interrogated. She accepted my feedback […]

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 3 days 2 hours ago

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candidate lied in their interview, negotiating beyond the top of the salary range, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Candidate lied to us in their interview I was recently involved in interviews for a promotion in my department. We interviewed three internal candidates, so we were familiar with each candidate’s work. The interview team consisted the hiring manager (Fran), Fran’s boss (Tom), and me. […]

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 3 days 13 hours ago

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HR panicked my employee by sending a mysterious meeting request right before the weekend

A reader writes: We received and validated some complaints about language used by a member of my team — off-color jokes, insensitive comments, etc. I agreed with HR that this did not rise to the level of a formal warning, but we would have a documented sit-down with the associate to explain it wasn’t acceptable […]

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 3 days 23 hours ago

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should I penalize candidates for not sending thank-you notes?

A reader writes: I am interviewing for two positions currently. So far I’ve interviewed six people and not one has sent any kind of follow-up or thank-you note. I can tell from the virtual meeting invite that they all have my email address, so that’s not the reason. I polled some friends and got a […]

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 4 days 1 hour ago

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I work with a substitute teacher who has terrible breath

A reader writes: I work at a K-12 school in a teacher-leader role. This means I do not have my own classes nor do I have management powers over any staff. Our school hires a substitute teacher to come to the building every day on the chance that one teacher is going to be unexpectedly […]

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 4 days 2 hours ago

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employee is afraid to fly, the office poopfoot, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Employee is afraid to fly I work on a small marketing team and have one direct report. A couple of times a year, our team is required to attend industry conferences to staff a booth. These events typically require air travel and are part of […]

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 4 days 13 hours ago

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weekend open thread – May 17-18, 2025

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: Dearly Departed, by Elinor Lipman. After the unexpected death of her mother, a single mom returns to her small hometown and realized life there […]

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 6 days 18 hours ago

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open thread – May 16, 2025

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to […]

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  Ask a Manager

 1 week ago

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In 51 U.S. states are published

757 Companies
355 Counties
524 Cities

The 5 newest Companies

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